How Your Core Beliefs Are Hindering Your Success

How Your Core Beliefs Are Hindering Your Success, Verite woman, manifesting, spirituality, mental health, core beliefs, how to be successful, how to be present in the moment, wellness, holistic living, women, feminism, female entrepreneurs.
I sat across from my therapist for our first session and within 15 minutes she had introduced the concept of core beliefs. Next came a handout — a piece of paper categorized into of varying, yet very common core beliefs that plague the greater population. Core beliefs encompass how we see ourselves, others, and how we digest the actions of the universe.

Only beautiful people are worthy of love

Men will hurt us if we let them in

I’m not smart enough to be successful

Artists don’t make money

Basically, just a list of daily taunts our mind tortures us with when we’re having an otherwise great day. The issue with these preconceived pillars of thought is that they are insanely limiting to our growth as people. When we can’t move beyond the walls of these ideas we can’t step into our highest form of self. And trust me, it can be difficult to mute that inner voice for even a minute. Take Vérité Woman, for example, when I started it three years ago I woke up every day with paralyzing anxiety that I had just taken on a career death wish. My core beliefs that surfaced were along the lines of “small businesses don’t succeed without funding”, “I am not smart enough to stand the tests”, “people don’t care about what I have to say”. The last one was especially tormenting and an effective way to get me right back into bed.

Where did these shitty mental barriers come from? We unknowingly picked them up along the way as we skipped through life. From impressions adults made on us from a very young age to our first heartbreak — we are like silly putty and every indent made sticks. So often in times of vulnerability, our core beliefs find satisfaction in engaging with the ego and going in for the kill. We’ve all seen it play out in relationships, as we jump to conclusions about what the other person may be feeling or how they may perceive us. Self-sabotage is the activity of choice when our core beliefs take the reigns and often it leads to demolishing situations before they are able to unfold, or worse never taking the plunge in the first place. How Your Core Beliefs Are Hindering Your Success, Verite woman, manifesting, spirituality, mental health, core beliefs, how to be successful, how to be present in the moment, wellness, holistic living, women, feminism, female entrepreneurs.

Vérité Woman or any aspect of my business hasn’t been a walk in the park, but without taking that risk, I would have never opened so many doors for myself, taken on the freedom of being my own boss, or met so many wonderful individuals who are the backbone of its inner-workings. So how do we change this built-in belief system to work for us not against us? We must first identify what our core beliefs are. For me, a weird one was “Writers don’t make money”. It literally doesn’t even make sense, I mean have I heard of a little lady named J.K. Rowlings? However, somewhere along the way, I picked up this visual of some semi-impoverished writer living in a tiny apartment with permanent bedhead and only the income to afford a diet of black coffee — and then I set out mirroring this life without even realizing it. By limiting myself to this idea and even semi romancing it, I allowed it to become real. Not because I’m not business savvy, or resourceful but because I believed it as if it were second nature. So the first step was identifying the roots of these deeply buried ideas. Once I had shed light on its beginnings and realized how silly and truly inaccurate my vision of a writer was, I was able to rewire that thought by visualizing all those I had seen succeed in this very industry. Similarly, my therapist had assigned me to come up with three core beliefs I had about myself, and then three examples for each that proved them null.

By rephrasing our inner conversation, we create a whole bunch of space in which we can build relationships, careers, ideas, lives. While you will never totally squash that voice — unless you become completely enlightened, and in which case please tell me how — being able to identify its intentions can free you.

Cool, I just wrote an article about hearing voices in my head.

 

Share This:

When Healthy Hurts

When Healthy HurtsWhen Healthy Hurts: Contributing wellness writer Julia Gall teaches us about how even the passion of wellness can lead to harmful eating disorders. Now on VERITE WOMAN., Eating Disorders, Health, Wellness, Orthorexia, Doctor Advice, Los Angeles, Clean Eating, Skinny, fit.Peruse any blog or scroll through your Instagram for a few minutes, and you are bound to be inundated with various images and portrayals of “wellness.” In Los Angeles it is particularly inescapable, where a juice bar or fitness club is on nearly every corner and workout gear is de rigueur. A casual conversation with a friend often turns to eating habits, and it seems that almost everyone I know is following a strict — albeit usually self-imposed dietary regimen. Whether it’s the avoidance of gluten or animal bi-products, food intolerance or sensitivity, or abolishment of an entire food group, it’s difficult to think of anyone who isn’t restricting themselves in one way or another. But at what point does the desire to be optimally healthy morph into an obsession and, moreover, disorder?
While the wellness movement is undoubtedly grounded in positive intentions, the adage still rings true: there can indeed be too much of a good thing. Although orthorexia is not recognized as an official eating disorder, the term was coined by Dr. Stephen Bratman in 1996 to describe an obsession with healthy eating, to the point where it becomes an all-encompassing compulsion. Dr. Bratman explains it as such: “an emotionally disturbed, self-punishing relationship with food that involves a progressively shrinking universe of foods deemed acceptable.” Anxiety, avoidance of social situations and a mind consumed by thoughts of self-established rules are also pervasive. Like most eating disorders Orthorexia is rooted in need for control.When Healthy Hurts: Contributing wellness writer Julia Gall teaches us about how even the passion of wellness can lead to harmful eating disorders. Now on VERITE WOMAN., Eating Disorders, Health, Wellness, Orthorexia, Doctor Advice, Los Angeles, Clean Eating, Skinny, fit.So how did we get here? Why is it that in a society so obsessed with the idea of wellness, so many people, especially women, seem to be feeling particularly unwell?

This brings us back to social media and the rise of Wellness as an industry. These days it seems that anyone with an Instagram account can be an “expert.” Despite what you may think scrolling through your feed, true wellness is not synonymous with “skinny.” It is not necessarily consuming seaweed collagen dust exclusively while completing a hardcore hour in the trending sweat-lodge of your choice, nor is it being the proud owner of a six-pack. The term “wellness” means the absence of illness, as well as the holistic integration of mind, body, and spirit. It is incredibly individual, for no two bodies are the same. Having worked as a fashion model for over ten years now, I am intensely aware of societal pressures put on to young women to look a certain way. As I’ve gotten older, I’ve become significantly more comfortable not only in my skin but also with saying no to those who do not accept me for the way I look in professional circumstances. To me, wellness means freedom to live the way I choose, without limitations. Looking after my whole self to the best of my ability has been my most worthwhile investment, and I can only hope to encourage other young women to do the same.

When Healthy Hurts: Contributing wellness writer Julia Gall teaches us about how even the passion of wellness can lead to harmful eating disorders. Now on VERITE WOMAN., Eating Disorders, Health, Wellness, Orthorexia, Doctor Advice, Los Angeles, Clean Eating, Skinny, fit.While the fact that Wellness is becoming such an integral part of young people’s lives these days is undoubtedly a step in the right direction, it is essential to acknowledge the risks of overdoing it. Avoiding spending time with friends or loved ones due to fear of certain foods being present, suffering from exhaustion caused by too many workouts in a single day, feeling weak or lightheaded, amenorrhoea, constant irritability and even depression can all be signs that one’s quest for peak health is becoming harmful. In the most authentic fashion of wellness, it is vital to be in tune with the body and recognize when rest, or perhaps a higher intake of calories, is needed. Moreover, it is just as important to be able to indulge on occasion, without guilt or remorse. Struggling to find that balance between discipline and self-care can indicate the beginning of disordered eating and should be promptly addressed. I have personally been in similar situations before and found it very helpful to re-center myself and focus on my ultimate goal: to nourish my body and live at my optimal level of wellbeing, as opposed to punishing myself.

When Healthy Hurts: Contributing wellness writer Julia Gall teaches us about how even the passion of wellness can lead to harmful eating disorders. Now on VERITE WOMAN., Eating Disorders, Health, Wellness, Orthorexia, Doctor Advice, Los Angeles, Clean Eating, Skinny, fit.In a world of magic dust for whatever may ail you and that costs a pretty penny, my advice is to take it all with a grain of salt. Rather than comparing your current diet and exercise preferences to those of a blogger you admire, take the time to look inward and take note of how your routine makes you feel. The sheer amount of wellness trends and (mis)information out there can be incredibly overwhelming, so remember to do your research and avoid self-diagnosing. When looking after your body, don’t forget about your mind as well – one cannot be healthy without the other. No matter what “wellness” may mean to you, there is no substitute for proper self-care and, most importantly, self-love.

Julia Gall is a Los Angeles based model and our contributing wellness guru. When she’s not sniffing out the latest in deliciously clean ingredients she’s sweating it out on the tennis courts!

Share This:

This Could Be Why You Haven’t Been Feeling Yourself Lately

This Could Be Why You Haven't Been Feeling Yourself Lately now on VERITE WOMAN, Self Care, mental health, trauma, me too movement, #metoo, sexual harassment, inclusive feminism, intersectional feminism, wellness.
Words and Photography by Michaela d’Artois.

Women are empathetic as fuck. I know this because if I’m being truly connected with myself, opening all lines of inner communication I can feel where my own body has absorbed the traumas of the world around me. In a time of the #MeToo movement, living in a country ruled by a sexual predator, and daily updates of unfolding cases of rape and sexual misconduct — our traumas go beyond those that have physically touched us.

In conversation with a friend seeking advice as to why she was so timid around those of the opposite sex, my own feelings were mirrored through her experiences. A few years free of a bad breakup, she was ready to jump into the dating pool once again, only her shyness was less a charming quirk and more an alienating aside. She had not been physically affected by sexual assault, however, it’s easy for me to believe as women we have all been victims of abuse in a mental capacity (so often in forms that go unnoticed), if not a physical one. As she spoke, my theory found its words. Bear with me.

Women absorb. We are constantly absorbing the emotions of our surroundings, picking up nuances of pain felt by our loved ones, violence towards our superior Mother Nature, and drinking in energies we can’t even detect until we feel the exhaustion roll through us. A 1995 study in the Scandinavian Journal of Psychology showed that women involuntarily imitate the emotional expressions of others. A characteristic we can blame on our brain’s “mirror neurons” that initiate us to match the emotional state or energy level of another being. Now on high alert, I see this play out in all the women around me as many of my close friends mention a feeling of being drained, only they can’t quite pinpoint why. Worse, so many women in my life, including myself have expressed symptoms of depression onset by the current state of our culture.

This Could Be Why You Haven't Been Feeling Yourself Lately now on VERITE WOMAN, Self Care, mental health, trauma, me too movement, #metoo, sexual harassment, inclusive feminism, intersectional feminism, wellness.Don’t get me wrong, these are growing pains that we must endure to find the change we seek. These movements for women to gain the justice they deserve are necessary, and we feel for them, all of us feel so deeply for the sadness, suppression, and shame they’ve carried.

It’s a beating-the-dead-horse example, but it’s truly the clearest line I can draw. When Trump was voted into office, it was days that I cried on and off, not because my team had lost, but due to the fact that I felt a huge chunk of my chosen country (I could be in Canada right now with Trudeau, and yes why aren’t I?) did not respect the welfare, and preservation of its female population. I no longer felt safe, or welcome for that matter. This emotional rollercoaster has followed me ever since, often feeling completely drained on days when I spend extra time debating whether Aziz Ansari was in the wrong or not (I strongly believe he was, don’t open this can of worms), or if all our favorite Hollywood folks were, in fact, hiding Weinstein’s secrets for him. These sound so surface but they are the truest representations of what goes on in every level of our society.

While the world seems on the brink of destruction and in a constant Twitter war of ill-resourced tactics we probably don’t even clock how much the acts of the greater establishments are adding to our daily stress levels. When our body is prompted to feel uneasy it releases stress hormones called adrenaline, noradrenaline, and cortisol which have some heavy affects on our physical self. This state wears on your nervous system and lowers the immune system making us more prone to illness. It can also lower our inner-mechanics ability to detox itself, allowing more gunk to build up in the body like mucus, and waste leaving us feeling sluggish, lethargic, and even *ding, ding, ding* depressed.

Women are also fucking resilient. Even in times of fear, we find it within ourselves to be resourceful and build a space for ourselves when one isn’t offered. That void you’ve been feeling for months, maybe years, it’s your empathy taking on the traumas of our sisters, our Earth, and all the female energies that have been wronged for much longer than we have been a feminine figure on this planet.

Ways I’ve found that have helped me level the effects of these second-hand traumas are:

By setting boundaries for myself with my intake of information. While being a “woke” member of this society is very important to me, I need to listen to myself about how much is too much. For example, I have personal trigger points that I cannot ignore.

That leads me to: be aware of trigger warnings. This doesn’t have to just be when it comes to the news you’re ingesting, but also when you’re out in the world. If something might be triggering for you, you absolutely do not have to do it.

By creating a safe space within my intimate community to hash out all the feelings. So many feelings. Sharing our current states, and talking it out was what lead me to realize a commonality between those close to me and the world around us as it is.

By finding time to turn off. Spending more time outside, and not in the presence of news alerts has helped me massively. If I take time every day to be in the quiet of nature, it recharges me to come back into 2018.

A few things helping ground us & keeping us happy during these weird times:
1. Ayurvedic massage oil to keep our body calm and balanced 2. five-minute journal to keep us conscious 3. face masks for self-care (duh) 4. Home cleansing kit to keep us zen in our mental and physical spaces 5. Ashwagandha as a natural depression fighter, hormone balancer, and mood booster!

Share This:

The Ayurvedic Night Cap That Promotes Your Most Beautifying Sleep

The Ayurvedic Night Cap That Promotes Your Most Beautifying Sleep -- VERITE PUBLISHED --- Ayurvedic medicine, wellness, health, natural insomnia treatment, sleep, coconut milk, turmeric, weightless.

It’s much past nightfall and you’re still tossing and turning, flicking through your social accounts — antsy to obtain sweet, deep sleep. It seems that in the age of electronics, and heightened levels of stress we are all a little prone to insomnia. Taking notes from the ancient Indian medicine of Ayurveda we share with you our sleepy drink — a concoction we’ve been using to detach from the woke world and get some Z’s.

Ayurveda weighs heavily on the use of herbs, and earthly elements to re-ignite our digestive fires, and steady any level of torment we may be feeling in the body, and mind. The use of that brilliant yellow powder turmeric is often present as it holds the ability to lessen inflammation in the body, and has been proven to boost your brains function. Full of antioxidants it is also promoting strong beauty sleep. That is why at the heart of of our sleepy elixir you will find a teaspoon of this pungent exotic root.

A little often missed fact about turmeric is that it is a soluble and can only be absorbed in the body when followed by a fat. The most commonly used is ground black pepper. This will ensure your body is pulling all those magical elements of the turmeric while you sleep.

While this powder’s color may be eye-catching, it’s flavor can be off-putting, especially as you slide beneath your sheets. This is where the cinnamon comes in, a sweet off-set to the taste. Cinnamon in aromatherapy can often be tied to helping with digestion, making this a great thing to sip on between your last meal and bedtime. Further, it helps shake depressive and stressful thoughts. Even further, it helps promote blood flow to the bodies sex organs in the event there are any activities you want to accomplish before you slip into REM.

Lastly, the whole glassful is tied together with the sweetness of coconut milk. Also known to promote digestion, weight loss, and brimming with good vitamins this will give you even more of that beautifying rest. We suggest throwing back a glass of this beverage either cold or warm about 30 minutes before bedtime. Without further adieu — the recipe…

Sweet Dreams Cocktail

1 cup coconut milk (warmed if preferred)
1 tsp turmeric powder
1 pinch ground black pepper
1 stick cinnamon

Mix flavors together and sip slowly

Share This:

Taking To The Waters with Collective Nude’s Detoxing Bath Potions — Discount Code Inside

Taking To The Waters with Collective Nude's Detoxing Bath Potions -- Verite Published ---- wellness, Detox, Epsom Salt, Bath Ritual

In each destination we seek out, it’s a passion to bring home elements of their traditional bath cultures and implement them into our very own beauty routines. From the steamy outdoor gardens and bubbling mineral pools of Japan’s Onsen, and Morocco’s Hammam that leaves you glowing inside and out, to Korea’s bath houses with their soak, steam, and milk honey massages — we can’t part with our water rituals. When you can’t take a quick jaunt across seas, Collective Nude invites these far off customs into your tub — ingredients like Moroccan rose, coral calcium powder, and neroli essential oil bring these locations to you. Each bag is designed to detox and renew you from the busy world outside with natural minerals. Use our discount code: VERITE for 20% off your purchase [code runs through 12.31.2016].

We dipped into a bag of Love Potion No. 1 and immediately melted away from stresses, while feeling an extra dose of self love, and dried off to find supple, happy skin.

Taking To The Waters with Collective Nude's Detoxing Bath Potions -- Verite Published ---- wellness, Detox, Epsom Salt, Bath Ritual

Share This: